Pinterest Conquered

I like Pinterest. However, the thing about it is that you see all of these REALLY COOL ideas- food, crafts, decor, clothing, kid activities- and at times it makes me feel like I need to be a Martha Stewart/Chasing Cheerios/Rachel Ray/ homeschooling, interior design guru spiritual fashionista. Clearly, I am not. I look at it more like "In my dream world (one that involved having free time and lots of storage in my home) I'd collect old tshirts to repurpose into baby bibs and have balanced meals every night." In the meantime, I feel like a champion just because I actual DID two cool things I saw on Pinterest. We'll celebrate the small things! Here are my current attempts:
1) 4th of July craft with foster daughter

Source: thrifttown.com via Emily on Pinterest

2) 4th of July yummies with Sammy

Source: allrecipes.com via Emily on Pinterest

These are the pics from Pinterest. Not going to post cute pictures of our final products, because ours aren't this cute and that would involve uploading pictures! Happy 4th of July weekend!

RIP MJ

I was seriously reprimanded for not knowing that the anniversary of Michael Jackson's death was yesterday. Somehow, that one didn't make my calendar. And when I innocently asked "Didn't he die last year?", you would have thought I asked if the grass was blue. In case you were wondering, it has been three years. When I said I like his music, but think he was creepy because of how he was inappropriate with kids, I was "set straight" about he couldn't have really done THAT.

I am up too late tonight because there is a sleepover going on in my basement and the plans for the night included all things MJ: watching The Wiz, making MJ shirts involving puffy paint (middle school flashbacks for me!) and singing MJ songs in his honor. In case you were worried that Michael Jackson wasn't being remembered appropriately, we've got it covered at my house.

Now the real question is if I can go to sleep with the giggling coming from the basement??

Embracing the chaos

I'm type A and so is my husband. No surprise there to anyone who knows us! I'm sure other type A people can relate to the adjustment that is required in being type A and having kids. While I write this, I can see Cheerios on the floor, toys that I cleaned up not that long ago already strewn around the room and breakfast remains still sitting on the table. We attempted to eat out last night at a restaurant that wasn't Chickfila. You know- where they hand you menus and you sit down at a table. We didn't get too crazy- it was a Mexican place 4 minutes from our house, so we were counting on quick service. Every couple of months I forget why we don't eat out any more. Then we attempt it and in the first five minutes I remember. We were that family with two screaming boys during several moments of the meal. You know, that family who leaves a good tip in apology for all of the chips on the floor. I think I'm getting better at embracing the chaos though. I actually still ate, enjoyed my food, didn't get in an argument with my hubby and we had a conversation in between meltdowns. I don't remember what we talked about, but hey... progress!

With each kid, I've tried to consciously let go of more of my expectations for myself, for our family and for the orderliness of the house. I fail often and catch myself getting worked up or stressed out about dumb things (like the amount of fingerprints on windows, refrigerators, dishwashers, any other surface under 3 feet tall!). When kiddo #3 became part of our family for now, I realized that tipping the parent/child ratio has challenges... even though she's not a toddler. I don't have to feed/diaper/etc. her... but there are still more kids than parents. I heard someone say it's like going from man-to-man to zone defense. At a Father's Day function, I caught myself counting "Where's #1? At the pool with adult supervision, check! #2 is being held by Grampa and #3 looks to be doing ok despite being introduced to ten of my family members in one setting!" Phew! I'm sure it will be easier as she gets more settled into our family, but as a mama, I am feeling the additional energy needed to care for 3 instead of 2!

Being a foster parent right now is certainly teaching my things about myself. There are things I thought I was decent at- you know, being patient, not being selfish. Then God brings this new situation and sheds light on just how IMPATIENT and SELFISH I can be. I forget how long it takes to get ready when you are 12. I forget how emotional you can be at 12. I forget how much you can care what your peers think and how "uncool" parents are... especially a foster parent who isn't your same race! So God's using these things to refine me, over and over. I guess that's just how life works... learn something, think I'm "good" at it, then try to apply it at the next situation/level and realize I still have lots to learn!! Ouch.

That's hot!

In honor of Father's Day, I thought I'd borrow Paris Hilton phrase (because who doesn't want to quote her!) and tell you one of the things I find most "hot" about my husband. We met in college- he lived a floor above me. We became friends while volunteering for KLIFE (student ministry in our college town). Middle school students gravitated towards him like magnets... and they still do. He might have scared a few off with outfits like this from his skit days in KLIFE (he's the one on the right): He's goofy, sometimes (ok, often) awkward, but in a way that engages people. So it should be no surprise that he is a great daddy. He is engaged and involved with our kiddos and they adore him. So it should have been no surprise to me that during a recent challenging moment with our foster kiddo, Jimmy handled it amazingly well. Ignoring the way she was treating him, he very calmly said repeatedly that no matter what she said in this moment or no matter what she had done, that he cares about here and is glad she is in our home. Now the statemnt in itself wasn't profound. However, over the past five years I've seen how God has moved my hubby's heart (and mine) to love and care for kids in need- THAT is profound. And super attractive. Happy Father's Day, Jimmy! I love you!

And we're back!

Last year after Andy was born, I gave up blogging because all of a sudden my free time was non existent. But I have to confess that I've missed it. It's like cheap therapy for me- writing or sharing little bits of my life. It doesn't really matter if anyone reads them or not. It's just therapeutic. And let's be honest, I can use some cheap therapy these days! Quick recap of the 18 months: had Andy in February of last year and then returned to dream teaching job at the community college for the past school year. I attempted to treat said job like a part time job and talked myself into believing that I was doing a great job as an instructor and mom. I made it to May, but there were casualties. My sanity, for one. After agonizing for a year about my decision (sorry to all who had to have the same conversation with me over and over!), I resigned from my full time dream job. I couldn't walk away completely so they are letting me teach a class here and there part time which will be good for my sanity and pocketbook! I realize it is nice to have a choice to work or not. It is a huge blessing and I'm not complaining! And about my need for cheap therapy... We reopened our foster parent license this spring. Once I decided to quit my job, I knew that this was the season to give the foster parenting another go. I was afraid if we waited, there would never be a "good time" to have your life interrupted by caring for another child. There will always be a reason why we are "too busy", so I wanted to jump back in while the call from God was still clear. We also decided to change up the ages of children we would accept in our home. Previously, we had ages 0-3. With the boys being young, I didn't think I could handle another baby. SO, we opened our license from 8-17. It was not an easy decision and we have had moments of being scared. Our #1 concern was protecting our boys. One day when I was asking God to again confirm His leading here, I read this article out of Thriving Family (awesome magazine!)

Our hands: unsterilized The great minister Norman Vincent Peale was a preacher's kid. His father, Clifford Peale, was a compassionate man, determined to help anyone who asked. One night, a woman from a local brothel phoned the Peale home. She wanted to know if the minister would come pray with a dying prostitute. Peale agreed, and when he hung up the phone, he said to his son, "Norman, put on your overcoat and come with me on an errand of pastoral mercy." Perhaps unsurprisingly, Norman's mother gasped. "You are not going to take our 10-year-old son to that place of sin," she said. "I am," the father replied. "Norman can see Jesus reaching for a sheep who was lost but wants to come home to the Father's house." Would I have taken my sons along on such a mission? Would you? Peale's story comes from a different era and culture, but it still challenges me. I wonder if we, as parents, often present to our kids a faith that has been overly sterilized, a faith that does not align with the inevitable reality of tougher times. Why should kids continue to find faith relevant if it doesn't appear viable during the good and bad? If my boys are going to learn to show God's love to our culture, I must be the one who introduces them to the needs of our culture. I need to show them how Christians care for kids who have no home, how they seek to heal marriages that are broken, how they help those who are physically and spiritually hungry. Kids need to see faith in action — a faith that isn't afraid of getting its hands dirty.

The whole article is great and the link is above. SO, we have our first placement. She has been with us two months. There have been sacrifices and adjustments... jumping in to parenting a preteen (hello, moods!) has not been easy (for me or for her!), but we love her. People say "I could never be a foster parent because it would be too hard to let them go." It is true- it is hard! When I think about our current kiddo leaving, it makes me feel sick. God keeps reminding me that He is in control and her Defender. The difficulty of letting go should not be anyone's reason to not be a foster parent- or to at least think about it, ask God if He's calling you to give it a try. I do worry about the boys- are they getting enough of my attention? Are they having to spend too much time in the car while I shuffle her to practices and appointments? My prayer is that the sacrifices they make will be a tool to mold their hearts- to teach them greater compassion, grace and gratefulness. So that's it... the Armstrong update. I plan to blog more for anyone else who wants to waste a few minutes on our story, but mostly for me to process and preserve my sanity :). It's good to be back!