God's Sense of Humor

God's timing is something I've learned a lot about in the past couple of years. He continues to have to pry my hands off of the control button in my life (I know, I'm not really in control even when I think I am!). Slowly, I feel like I've made some progress, largely thanks to my husband who slows me down to listen more and be ok with waiting. So when I had a full out pity party a few weeks ago because we didn't have a clear "plan" for expanding our family, Jimmy just said it sounds like we need to wait because we don't have clarity on which direction to take. Seriously, more waiting?

Although I still don't love waiting, I have gotten to a point of peace about the fertility struggles we've had. I still have had sad days or days of heart ache, but in general, I can say with honesty that I have surrendered that desire to God. I haven't even prayed about it in a long time because I am confident that God knows my heart and I trust Him. So fertility options haven't been on the table when we discuss growing our family because we haven't had a peace about that. Heck, I had even started to celebrate the benefits of no stretch marks, sagginess or weight gain!

So imagine my surprise when I found out that we're pregnant!

I wish I could say I began a dance of praise, but I first cussed, drove to Hyvee late at night to buy three more tests, took them and called the doctor begging to get in ASAP because I didn't trust the little tests. After several confirmations that I wasn't dreaming, I finally could praise God for this second miracle and let the reality sink in. Because of my issues, the first few weeks have been a little "high risk", but thanks to some high doses of hormones, all is well and the first trimester is almost behind us. We've heard the heartbeat three times and have seen the baby twice now.

We have heard so many people say "Oh after you adopt (or after you become foster parents) you'll get pregnant." Honestly, it's kind of an annoying comment :). Getting pregnant was not on our radar at all. We have been so blessed by our adoption experience that brought us Samuel and our experience as foster parents. We are thankful for the blessing of this baby, too, and totally humbled by God's plans. However, if all does not go well with the pregnancy, we are STILL blessed and He is still faithful.

So hitting "publish post" makes this news so much more real... yikes!